Raising Children

Bismillahir Rahmanir Rahim
In the name of Allah, the Most Beneficent, the Most Merciful

Raising Children 

By Khadejah Jones

Providing children with Islamic education and raising them up as good practicing Muslims are essential duties of parenthood. Rightfully fulfilling these duties will lead to the Pleasure of Allah and good for the parents and the child in this life and the Hereafter. However, ignoring these duties would lead to the destruction of the child's Hereafter and the Wrath of Allah will befall the parents for not protecting their child from the traps of Shaytan and allowing him to choose the path of destruction.

Allah's Messenger (peace and blessings be upon him) said: "Each of you is a shepherd and each of you is responsible for his flock. The leader is a shepherd and is responsible for his flock, a man is the shepherd of his family and is responsible for his flock; a woman is the shepherd in the house of her husband and is responsible for her flock, the servant is the shepherd of his master's wealth and is responsible for it. Each of you is a shepherd and is responsible for his flock." [Sahih al-Bukhari and Sahih Muslim]

Allah says in the Quran:

{O you who believe! Save yourselves and your family from a fire whose Fuel are men and stones.} [Noble Quran 66:6]

One of the ways of protecting your children from the Fire is to let him memorize the Words of Allah.

The Prophet (peace and blessings be upon him) said:  "If the Quran is gathered in a body (i.e. a person), Allah will not burn him with the Fire." [al-Baihaqi, Authenticated by Sheikh al-Albani]

"Teaching the children the Quran is a fundamental from the fundamentals of Islam. By it the child will grow upon the Fitrah (natural Islamic monotheism) and the lights of wisdom will rush to their hearts before the desires are able to settle in them and darken them with the cloudiness of disobedience and misguidance, " said al-Hafidth as-Suyooti.

This is because the child from the early age will be protected from the temptations of the world and whispers of the Shaytan, he will live and grow up among the gathering of Dhikr (remembrance of Allah) where tranquility and the mercy of Allah of descends, and as a result Allah will preserve his Fitrah (natural inclination of Islamic Monotheism)

The Prophet (peace and blessings be upon him) said:  "No people gather in a house of the houses of Allah (i.e. Masjid) reciting the Book of Allah and studying it among themselves, except that the tranquility descends upon them, and Allah mentions them to those who are with Him (the lofty gathering of Angels)." [Sahih Muslim]

Your child will be given a position in Paradise according to the number of verses he memorizes from the Book of Allah, it will be said to him on the Day of Judgment as the Prophet (peace and blessings be upon him) said:

"'Read, ascend and recite with slow, rhythmic chanting just as you used to recite in the worldly life. For verily, your position (in Paradise ) will be at the place of the last verse that you recite." [Abu Dawud and at-Tirmidhi]

Every time your child goes to the Masjid to learn the Quran he will have the reward of a perfect Hajj. The Prophet (peace and blessings be upon him) said:

"Whoever goes to the Masjid in the morning having no intention except to learn something good or teach it he will have the reward like the person who performs Hajj." [At-Tabari. Authenticated by Sheikh al-Albani]

The Prophet (peace and blessings be upon him) said to Abu Dharr,

"O Abu Dharr! That you set out in the morning and learn one verse from the Book of Allah is better for you than if you prayed one hundred Rak'ahs (units of prayer)." [Ibn Majah]

The Quran will intercede for your child on the Day of Judgment, Allah's Messenger (peace and blessings be upon him) said:

"Recite the Quran for verily it will come on the Day of Judgment as an intercessor for those who recited it." [Sahih Muslim]

Your child will be given to wear garments and a crown of honor on the Day of Judgment. The Prophet (peace and blessings be upon him) said:

"The Quran will come on the Day of Judgment and say, 'Oh Lord! Adorn him.' So the person will be made to wear the crown of honor. Then it (the Quran) will say, 'Oh Lord! Increase him.' So the person will be made to wear the garment of honor. Then it will say, 'Oh Lord! Be pleased with him.' So Allah will be pleased with him. Then it will be said, 'Recite and ascend.' And the person will receive an extra good deeds for every verse (that he recites of the Quran.)" [Sahih at-Tirmidhi]

The Prophet (peace and blessings be upon him) said:

"Whoever recites the Quran, learns it and acts upon it will be given a crown of light to wear on the Day of Judgment and its light will be like the light of the sun." [Sahih al-Hakim]

So, why not encourage our children to memorize the Quran and make them one of the best individuals of this Ummah. Allah's Messenger (peace and blessings be upon him) said: "The best of you are those who learn the Quran and teach it." [Sahih al-Bukhari]

Allah, the Exalted, has also promised abundant rewards for those parents who guide their children to memorize the Quran. The Prophet (peace and blessings be upon him) said:

"Whoever recites the Quran, learns it and acts according to it will be given a crown of light to wear on the Day of Judgment whose light will be like the sun. His parents will be clothed in two garments that did not exist in this worldly life. So they will say, 'What has caused us to be clothed (in these garments)?' It will be said, 'Your child taking hold of (i.e. memorizing) the Quran has caused this.'" [Al-Hakim graded it authentic]

When the parents leave a righteous child behind them, the child will be a source of reward and blessing for them after their death, for Allah's Messenger (peace and blessings be upon him) said:

"When a man dies, all his good deeds come to an end, except for three cases; the charity of continuous blessings, beneficial knowledge which he leaves behind and a righteous child who prays for him." [Sahih Muslim]

The parents will also receive equal amount of reward that the child receives by memorizing or reciting the Quran, for the parents guide him to this good act and instill in his heart the love for Islam, and the love for the Book of Allah.

The Prophet (peace and blessings be upon him) said:  "Whoever guides to something good is like the one who does it." [Sahih Muslim] and:

"Whoever invites to guidance will receive the reward like the rewards of those who follow him and that will not diminish anything from their rewards..." [Sahih Muslim]

The parents should also send those children who are intelligent and bright to learn the Quran and Islamic education. It should not be that only those children who when are unsuccessful in worldly studies are sent to Madras as for religious studies. The parents should realize the importance of Islamic education for their children and raising well-educated Muslims who would in the future work for the Cause of Islam.

The Prophet (peace and blessings be upon him) said:

"The example of guidance and knowledge with which, Allah has sent me is like abundant rain falling on the earth, some of which was fertile soil, absorbed rain water and brought forth vegetation and grass in abundance. (And) another portion of it was hard and held the rainwater and Allah benefited the people with it and they utilized it for drinking, making their animals drink from it and for irrigation of the land for cultivation. (And) a portion of it was barren which could neither hold the water nor bring forth vegetation (then that land gave no benefits). The first is the example of the person who comprehends Allah's religion and gets benefit (from the knowledge), which Allah has revealed through me (the Prophet) and learns and then teaches others. The last example is that of a person who does not care for it and does not take Allah's guidance revealed through me (He is like that barren land.)" [Sahih al-Bukhari v.1 no.79]

Those parents who give the excuse that their child is weak or does not have good memory or 'he is not gifted', should know that Allah has said in the Quran: {And indeed we have made the Quran easy to remember.} [Noble Quran 54:17]

And the Messenger of Allah (peace and blessings be upon him) said:

"Whoever treads on a path in search of Islamic knowledge, Allah will ease the way to Paradise for him. The Angels will lower their wings, pleased with this seeker of knowledge, and everyone in the heavens and on earth will ask forgiveness for the knowledgeable person, even the fish in the deepest of waters will ask for his forgiveness." [Sahih Abu Dawud, Ibn Majah and at-Tirmidhi (2835)]

It is not mandatory for your child to memorize the complete Quran. If he is not able to memorize the complete Quran then know that only attending daily circle for memorization will suffice your child for it will accustom him to frequent the places of worship rather than visiting evil gatherings. Your child will find good companions which will protect him from deviating and adopting evil habits and practices. Allah says:

{And keep yourself patiently with those who call on their Lord, morning and afternoon, seeking His Face and let not your eyes overlook them, desiring the pomp and glitter of the life of the world; and obey not him whose hearts We have made heedless of Our Remembrance, one who follows his own lust and whose affairs (deeds) have been lost.} [Noble Quran 18:28]

Source: IdealMuslimah.com

Abu Hurairah (May Allah be pleased with him) reported: Messenger of Allah (PBUH) said,

 "Hasten to do good deeds before you are overtaken by one of the seven afflictions.'' Then (giving a warning) he said, "Are you waiting for such poverty which will make you unmindful of devotion; or prosperity which will make you corrupt, or disease as will disable you, or such senility as will make you mentally unstable, or sudden death, or Ad-Dajjal who is the worst expected absent, or the Hour, and the Hour will be most grievous and most bitter".  

[At-Tirmidhi]

Bismillahir Rahmanir Rahim
In the name of Allah, the Most Beneficent, the Most Merciful

Zuhd: An Anti-dote to Consumerism Culture

December 28, 2010

by ProductiveMuslimView Comments

Posted on Tuesday, December 28, 2010 in Tips

One of the biggest enemies of productivity in our world today is the comfortable consumerism culture that we’re living in.

Everything is within reach and we’re constantly looking for the latest, quickest, or smallest! Each of us (except whom Allah (Subhanahu Wa Ta’ala) had mercy upon) is literally ‘killing’ themselves running after acquiring more and more of today’s world and what’s sad about this is that we, as Muslims, should know better.

History seems to repeat itself, for the Muslim Ummah did indulge in such consumerism more than 1,000 years ago, during the Golden Age of the Islamic civilisation. The success of the expanding empire brought new riches unknown to the early Muslims which started corrupting the Muslims and making them forget their true purpose. True to the words of the Prophet (Peace be upon him), this consumerism destroyed us. In a hadeeth, the Prophet Muhammad (Peace be upon him) said: ”By Allah, it is not the poverty about which I fear in regard to you but I am afraid in your case that (the worldly) riches may be given to you as were given to those who had gone before you and you begin to vie with one another for them as they vied for them. And these may destroy you as these destroyed them.” (Sahih Muslim, Book #042, Hadith #7065).

Fighting Consumerism

So what’s the problem with consumerism? And what’s the cure? This is what we’ll try to tackle in this article insha’Allah.

At first glance, nothing seems to be wrong with consumerism, in fact the objective seems noble and peaceful: it’s about living a comfortable and happy life and enjoying this world to the fullest. Nothing sinister, right? Well, not really. If you start thinking of our lives in terms of dunya AND Akhira, you start to realise that this consumerism culture is actually a distraction us from our true purpose in life, of worshipping Allah (Subhanahu Wa Ta’ala) and being His true vicegerent on Earth.

Let me give you an example: Imagine a student who’s supposed to start his University degree this year, he’s so concerned about ‘comfort’ that he asks for a special couch in the lecture hall, 3D HDTV screen to watch his favourite show whilst the lecture is going on, and of course popcorn and a packet of chips, and he doesn’t want to take exams nor do any assignments. Who thinks this student would survive university life? Or would even get a degree?! Sounds bizarre, right? But that’s exactly what we’re doing, instead of us working for our Akhira, we’re so concerned about the comforts of this life and how we can make our lives just that bit extra comfortable and easier, that we’re trading our finite world with the infinite Akhira! There’s nothing wrong in being comfortable; but when this becomes our sole objective, that’s when it becomes a problem!

Another issue with consumerism culture is that it literally entraps and enslaves people so they think of nothing else but how to ‘get more and have more’. People get into debt to buy bigger houses, get into more debt to buy a better car, few years down the line, once they’ve paid their debts, they go through the whole cycle again and get into more debt. 

We always want the latest, biggest, smallest, newest, and as the Prophet (Peace be upon him) said: ”Nothing fills (satisfies) the son of Adam except Dust”. (Sahih Bukhari, Book #76, Hadith #445) i.e. A person will never be satisfied till he meets death. The cash-less credit card society is teaching us to buy now and worry about paying later. It is directly feeding us into a 25-50 year slavery to financial institutions and banks; on most accounts, this was one of the reasons behind the recent severe global financial crisis.

A third grave consequence of the consumerism lifestyle – and this one has truly affected the Muslims – is that we’ve become lazy, expecting “others” to produce whilst we consume. We do not grow what we eat, we do not make what we wear, we do not produce what we ride, everything is imported from planes to biscuits! And everything is at our convenience. But there’s a problem here: we become dependants on “others” for our survival, and hence have a weak economic status in the international sphere. How do you think China, India and Brazil started to get noticed by the ‘Developed World’? They became producing/exporting countries and unless we as Muslims really get our act together and export more than we import, I’m afraid the consequences would be severe for the Ummah.

An Anti-dote: Zuhd

So how do we get out of this? Al-hamdulillah, we’ve a very powerful Islamic concept that would work as an anti-dote to consumerism culture. This is known as ‘Zuhd’ (known in English as Asceticism). Unfortunately, this concept has been grossly misunderstood and misinterpreted by many Muslims to mean complete refusal of dunya, hiding in a corner, and living a miserable, harsh and sad life.

Far from this, Zuhd according to the Sunnah of the Prophet (Peace be upon him) and the understanding of the Companions (May Allah be pleased with them) has a very simple but powerful meaning: it means to hold dunya in your hand, but not letting it into your heart. What this means is that you should work for dunya, but never let that take over your life that you forget the Akhira. You should build this dunya but when you’re asked to sacrifice some of it for Allah (Subhanahu Wa Ta’ala) and His Messenger (Peace be upon him), you can easily do it, because the dunya is in your hands and not your heart.

If we look at the life of the Prophet Muhammad (Peace be upon him) and His companions, we’d find many examples of such understanding of ‘Zuhd’. Prophet Muhammad (Peace be upon him) once said: ”The worldly comforts are not for me. I am like a traveller, who takes a rest under a tree in the shade and then goes on his way.” (Tirmidhi). 

The companions of the Prophet (Peace be upon him) even feared the worldly pleasures. One example being that a meal was brought to ‘Abdur-Rahman bin ‘Auf once when he was fasting. He said: ”Mustab bin ‘Umar was martyred and he was better than I and was shrouded in his Burd and when his head was covered with it, his legs became bare, and when his legs were covered his head got uncovered. Hamza was martyred and was better than I. Now the worldly wealth has been bestowed upon us (or said a similar thing). No doubt, I fear that the rewards of my deeds might have been given earlier in this world.” Then he started weeping and left his food. (Sahih Bukhari, Book #23, Hadith #365).

I want to emphasize at this point, that I’m not against people improving their livelihood in this world and enjoying the blessings of Allah (Subhanahu Wa Ta’ala). Some of the Companions (May Allab be pleased with them) of the Prophet (Peace be uponhim) had thriving businesses, ate good food, and built nice homes, but once the call to sacrifice for Islam came, they threw all that away and ran for the Akhira.

Work and Sacrifice were the building blocks of the Islamic civilisation, not the palaces, art, and consumerism lifestyle. Those who came after the first 3 generations of Islam forgot these 2 ingredients and the Muslim civilisation declined.

After all that, don’t worry – there’s still hope!

We can still pick up the tools that were left by our ancestors, the tools of hard work and sacrifice, and rebuild our Ummah bi’ithnillah. Equipped with these, we can push dunya from our hearts and into our hands. Individually and collectively we can rebuild a new beginning for the Muslim Ummah – one that fights consumerism, encourages production, and gives back to the world more than it consumes.

Some Practical Tips

I leave you with 3 tips to help you take action today:

1. Adopt a Minimalistic lifestyle: Build your life around what you ‘need’, rather than what you ‘want’. Be like the traveller as the Prophet (Peace be upon him) said in the hadeeth and live simply. Donate or throw away what you don’t need, and only keep those items that are essential to your day to day life. Believe me, you’ll feel so much ‘lighter’ as a consequence. (If you want more details about how to life a minimalist life, I highly recommend mnmlist website:
2. Invest more, consume less: Try your best to always invest more of your resources (time, money, strength) and consume less. Invest your time in learning, helping others, volunteering, and worshipping. Invest your money in charity, new or existing businesses, helping Muslim charities and non-profit organisations. Invest your strength in working for Allah (Subhanhu Wa Ta’ala), helping the poor and needy and supporting those around you in whatever physical means possible.
3. Spread the simplicity message: Encourage your family and friends to live a simple life rather than a material based one. It was said that simplicity is a part of faith and therefore try to spread the message about how we can fight our consumerism culture and what actions we can take from the Qur’an and Sunnah today to achive this. With sincere intentions and hard work, it can be done!

I hope this article has inspired you to take a look into your life differently, and inspired you look at dunya as a door to Akhira and not a door to limited comfortable life.

Source: http://www.productivemuslim.com/zuhd-an-anti-dote-to-consumerism-culture/

Abu Hurairah (May Allah be pleased with him) reported: Messenger of Allah (PBUH) said,

 "Hasten to do good deeds before you are overtaken by one of the seven afflictions.'' 
Then (giving a warning) he said, "Are you waiting for such poverty which will make you unmindful of devotion; or prosperity which will make you corrupt, or disease as will disable you, or such senility as will make you mentally unstable, or sudden death, or Ad-Dajjal who is the worst expected absent, or the Hour, and the Hour will be most grievous and most bitter".  

[At-Tirmidhi]